Shining

Look at you there, shining from a distance

I bet he took away every little worry you had

His arm around your waist hurts like a bitch

What bullshit emotions neither happy nor sad.

You don’t know about my presence here yet

I think you entered drunk with your friends

That cute girl from all of your pictures

That asshole whose sight you secretly dread.

You look gorgeous by the way

Unfortunately, I can’t say it out loud

Your boyfriend wouldn’t like that

Not me greeting you, not me being around.

I remember that thing you are wearing

I chose that color for you myself

You really have got something to collect all that courage

To wear that in his arms, oh god I need help.

You really love him, don’t you?

I remember that’s exactly how you used to look at me

Oh no you turned around walking towards me now

Honestly, I would, you rather not have me see.

“Tyler!? Hello, what are you doing here?”

“Nothing much, exactly what you’re doing dear”

Long time no see good to run into you”

You don’t mean it from heart, do you?

“I didn’t know we had mutuals still”

“Well the world’s a small place what can we say”

“Well, I’ll get to go but see you around I guess?”

“Of course, I have some songs to play either way”

I walk my best walk, I want your friends to stare

I’ll do my best, hiding my despair

And oh, the goal is to make YOU regret it too by the way

With my body-fit tux and the way you liked my hair.

I walk to the stage, climb it in a single step

You know exactly what’s coming don’t you

I sing my best chorus with my eyes blinking in yours

The same love in my voice as I’ve always had for you.

I go on and on, fixing my gaze on your cheekbones

Here I’m stripping my throat for you, there you wear his coat

I can see it on his face, he knows exactly what I’m doing

I bet he begs his god that in hell, I rot.

Moments pass by with glimpses of you

Your sight is scarring me, love, please stop

I feel like I’m being beaten to death while my larynx refuses to speak up

You’re killing my last few pints of hope.

So I drench myself in drinks one after another

But you don’t care, who am I anymore

You were right, it makes standing unwanted things easier

Please don’t kiss him in front of me, you whore!

If you wanted my heart broken so badly

You should just have told me, honey

I would have broken it myself for you

And give it to you as a souvenir to store.

But I can see I have lost my war here

Its evident from the way you let him hold you

I’m losing it at the bar while your friends

Stand there laughing, clicking memories for you two.

I begin to leave as you notice and motion towards me

“Going so early honey, don’t find anything else amusing to see?”

“I’m tired, have an early morning tomorrow,

I can drop you home if you please?”

“Oh no I’m staying at his place today”

And that were the last words I heard from you that night

“Okay then, guess I’ll get going then”

I lost, I knew, wasn’t even worth a fight.

Look up at the sky baby

All the stars that you see?

If you count them and get a number

That’s how many pieces in, you broke me.